My dream last night...

I dreamed last night, I was walking down a hall, narrow, and an empty comforter and empty pillow sham fell from up above me. I picked them up, and walked on, holding onto them. I was in a line of girls, we were being 'shown' the way to go. We were in this big room, 'they' were telling me where I could sleep. There were wide steps, and a woman/girl was on each one. I could see no place for me to go. I didn't fit in anywhere. She said...go up there, and find a place. I walked as far as I could. There was no spot for me. So, I just laid down, right there in the corner. I fell between a crack in the floor and the wall. I was scared, but before I could get out, the 2 walls of the house smiled, and the Big house hugged me, the house was holding me.

When I interpret dreams, on Keen or otherwise, this is how I do it. I go back into the symbols of the dream, look at what stands out. Then I see a story of what the dream is saying, in the language of symbols. I will show you here....

I dreamed last night, I was walking down a hall, narrow, and
walking, going somewhere, down-inner chambers, the hall, a place many doors may seem closed, but can open. Narrow, hard, feeling pressured, squeezed.
a empty comforter and empty pillow sham fell from up above
empty, nothing left, sad comfort, and empty pillow, a sham, not what it appears. Fall to me, I grab them, hold onto them. Keep on going...
me. I picked them up, and walked on, holding onto them. I was
many females are here with me, others are showing us the way
in a line of girls, we were being 'shown' the way to go. We
to go, we all end up in the same place.
were in this big room, and they were telling me where I could
who is telling me? Should I be listening to them? I don't know.
sleep. There were wide steps, and a girl/woman was on each
sleep, rest, shut up. Wide steps, each one had someone on that step. I could see women on every step.
one. I could see no place for me to go. I didn't fit in
What step do I belong on? I could see no place for me to go, I don't belong here, I should be married, with a family. I was a good wife, good mother. I don't fit in this single scene. I don't know where to go to get out of this place, where is the door? I keep listening for direction, and it seems to keep getting worse. Sadder. Empty. Help me.
anywhere. She said, go up there, and find a place. I walked
go up, higher, reach higher, just go. Find a place, any place. Doesn't really matter.
as far as I could, there was no spot for me. So, I just laid
I have gone as far as I can, and find no spot for myself. Exhausted, I just laid down, gave up.
down, right there in the corner. I fell between a crack in
fell between the cracks, how funny. cracks on the floor, couldn't get much lower, really. and against the wall, I am against the wall. Or I have the wall, a really high one. That seems to be the only sure thing I have, is the wall.
the floor, and the wall. I was scared, but before I could get
I am scared, this is not where I thought I would be. Ever.
out, the 2 walls of the house smiled, and the Big house
before I get out of where I am, 2 of the walls smile. A really big sweet smile. Like this is all so funny, and not what I think it is. It is a big house, I cannot see all of it. Maybe the walls know more than I do.
hugged me. The house was holding me.
They hug me, hold me through the night. The house is there for me. It holds me.

Last Saturday was my birthday. I went out for a late lunch with Julie, one of my best friends. I come home, worked on Keen. Am feeling sorry for myself, wish I was out with a big hunky man, celebrating this passage of my life. I have to practice saying how old I am, it's not coming easy this year. But, no date, I am home alone. I go to sleep about midnight. 3:30 in the morning, a neighbor,Pat, beats on my door, 'the apartments are on fire' she screams. I open my door to see about 12 fire trucks, red flashing lights, right in front of me, and thick black smoke everywhere. 2 units, (cold terms for 2 small homes of someone I have waved at while getting my mail) are burning. A furnace caught fire. Just an accident. Could happen to anyone. We are all sent away for the rest of the night/day, all power and gas lines are shut off. Go somewhere. Come back later. I am standing in the parking lot, in the strangest outfit,( try grabbing clothes in utter panic, dressing while you assess what you should grab, may never see again, and run down the stairs at the same time.) Almost funny. But not. I go have coffee, and wait awhile, where can I go at 4 in the morning? I finally call Meme, a friend,and ask to go there, feels rather humbling. Is humbling. My daughter Anna says, you should move, now. Today. I cannot. Yet, I am afraid. And I hate being afraid. I think this event triggered my dream.

For every one that calls me for readings, and is alone, searching for the love of their life, I am there with you. My dream says I have listened to every voice that tells me how to do it. I am in a huge group of women, at every step of the journey, and I can't even find a place I belong, being single. I am so utterly discouraged. Tired. I decided to stop dating, if you could call it that. I call it being rejected by men you would not even really 'normally' consider dating. And what self esteem you might have a shred of left, gets pummeled into nothing. Hence, just find a corner and lay down. Give up. I painted my sewing room, and my bedroom. Am working on the rest of the walls. Ah, the walls! I am decorating my WALLS! But, my walls seem to be the only thing protecting me, they actually are smiling at me, happy to be painted, and decorated. They are holding me. I had spent a fortune on a silky comforter and pillow shams. Painted the bedroom walls, and the colors hated each other. Sold the whole bedding set on Ebay. Bought another set. Don't know if I like it or not. But I love the wall color. Reminds me of my favorite lipstick color, a rich burgundy. Very girl-y. The expensive bedding brought only 'empty' feelings. No one to share it with. Small or no comfort. Painting my walls seems to be making sense. And get this, I live in the corner, of the big apartment building. 2 walls are where I sleep, in the corner. Those 2 walls hold me at night. Even in the fire, I was safe.

And so are you.

If you ever want to know what your dreams are telling you, call me. It can be fun decoding them. Or profound. I think I'll finish painting all my walls. See what else they say in the next dream.