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Entertaining, Sassy, Creative, Deep, Passionate. Artistic, Tender, Opinionated. Joyful, Stubborn, Grateful, Humble.

Monday, December 17, 2007

This is the Best, Worst, & Spiritual Interpretation of the Tarot. I love this deck, the Golden Tarot of Klimt. His art work is so descriptive, very edgy. The three cards I drew were....


9 of Cups

Ace of Swords

Best......Stop longing for what you desire. Your wish is already attained, right in front of you. Open the door....

Worst......Hopeless and defeated, you give up. What you long for seems just out of reach. You give up, and what you want is just about yours....but you notice it not.

Spiritual.....Stop praying for what you think you don't have. Your prayer is already answered. Visualize having it. Feel it. Focus on it. Your waiting is over...act like it.

This is a fun way to see different aspects of your readings. Play with your cards....and maybe all the interpretations are right. Have fun with it....Linda

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Tarot Poetry
2 of Cups....kiss
3 Cups....grace
Ace of Swords....one
King of Pentacles....treasure
Kiss me goodnight, every night, forever
Grace is the gift you are to me
The sweetest place is in your arms
One, we are.
I treasure you.
Who you are and where you are, I know not.
I just believe you are.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

'Mall gunman called quiet and depressed
A high school dropout with a criminal past, Robert A. Hawkins had struggled to overcome depression. But friends thought he was making strides.
Then, about two weeks ago, he lost his girlfriend. A week later, it was his job. His friends worried he would regress.
"He was a very helpful young man, but he was quiet," said Debora Maruca-Kovac, a surgical nurse whose family took in Hawkins after her 17- and 19-year-old sons befriended him.
"He didn't cause a lot of trouble. He tried to help out all the time," Maruca-Kovac said. "He was very thankful for everything. He wasn't a violent person at all."
But Maruca-Kovac said she saw nothing foreshadowing the horror Hawkins would inflict during his last moments alive. She remembered a gentle young man who loved animals. But she had a feeling of despair soon after she learned about Wednesday shootings. By then, she had learned of a suicide note that Hawkins had left behind.
"I had a feeling it could be him," she said.
She told The Associated Press that she and her husband let Hawkins stay with them after he was kicked out of his family's house. She would not say why his family had kicked him out, but court records show that at least once he was termed a ward of the state, which legally removed him from his parents' custody.
With Hawkins living in her home, Maruca-Kovac could see he had a drinking problem and was an occasional marijuana smoker. He enjoyed music and video games — "normal teenager stuff," she said.
"He was depressed, and he had always been depressed," Maruca-Kovac said. "But he looked like was getting better."
Hawkins had earned a GED after dropping out of Papillion-La Vista High School. He got a driver's license after moving in with the Maruca-Kovacs and five months ago started working at a McDonald's restaurant near their raised ranch-style home in a middle-class neighborhood in Bellevue, Maruca-Kovac said.
Hawkins lived with several friends for a couple days at a time before landing at Maruca-Kovac's house last year, she said.
"He was like a lost pound puppy that nobody wanted," she said. "I felt sorry for him. I let him stay, and we tried to get him on his feet."
In the note, which was turned over to authorities, Hawkins wrote that he was "sorry for everything" and would not be a burden on his family anymore.
"Now I'll be famous," he wrote.
Maruca-Kovac went to the medical center, where victims of the shooting soon began to arrive.'
As I watched in horror the news, this story makes me ripping mad. I know he violently killed 9 people and physically hurt many others, mentally he irrevocably damaged everyone in the mall. Does ANYONE SEE WHY? Hurt people, hurt people.
The damage of being, not just feeling, but really being unwanted. Losing what you love. Over and over. Living in someone else's home, being grateful for them letting you have a couch to sleep on. This morning on the news, they were interviewing the lady he had been living with, and they ask her, 'do you think you did enough to try to help him?' She apologetically said, 'I guess not. Look at what happened.' What the hell? She opened her home, listened to him, was one person that DID something. Where is his family? Where are the Christians at? Where are the Spiritually evolved people that are supposed to be here to ease the suffering on this insane planet? He was quiet, because he stopped talking. NO ONE WAS LISTENING. What is wrong with people. He wanted to be remembered. He wanted what we all want, someone to want us, to love us, to LISTEN to us. And really hear us. His family, girlfriend, workplace, life, didn't want him. WERE NOT LISTENING. I drew one card about, Why? Why did he do this? The Justice Card. He executed his own justice. And his own death. Even now, they're not counting him among the dead. Why? He died too. And left a brutal gash in the homes and lives of innocent shoppers at that mall. Ironic, people shopping for gifts for other people they love. Merry Christmas. He didn't FEEL loved or WANTED. He was screaming for help, for someone to know him. To just remember him, love him. Well, now they'll remember him. How horrible. 'ye have ears, but you do not hear.' someone named Jesus said this. anybody remember him?

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

I love using Corrine Kenners' book, 'Tarot Journaling' for new ways to play with the Tarot. This morning, I am using 4 questions from page 144, get into the character. I drew this card randomly, He is the King of Pentacles.
I am the King of Pentacles. You would never guess it by looking at me, but.....I look like I have it all together, but I really don't. My stuff is what I hide behind. And I have alot of stuff. If that stuff shows the world, how successful I am, then I have it all. But not really. Do you see a lady by me, here? Or adoring children? No. You see fields of crops, more money, more work. Both of my hands are full, of more stuff. My eyes are looking to the past, somewhere back there I had something worth more than money. And I chose the money. How regal, I look, and strong. What a great actor I am. My stuff doesn't keep me warm at night.
I am the King of Pentacles, when I look back on my life I am ashamed about...the choices I made. About thinking this was all there is to attain, money, property, stuff. I am ashamed I didn't share more of it with people that needed it. I just piled it up all around me, and worshiped it.
I am the King of Pentacles, you need me because....you think with your heart, and aren't the most practical person. Someone has to be practical and plan for a secure future. You live by the seat of you pants, and just flit through life. Get serious, have a financial plan, where will you be in 5 years?
I am the King of Pentacles, I have a secret. It is....I really do care about other people. I take care of them, but behind the scenes. I don't want anyone to know I have a soft side. I seem gruff and stern, but the reason I try so hard to have this stuff, well, to enjoy it, but also to later give it away. When I don't need it anymore, I will surprise you who I give it to. And you'll find out I did have a tender heart, instead of a cold calculating, cash register ticking inside my proud chest. Maybe I needed the stuff to fill a empty place inside me? Please, look beyond what you see, look deeper. The stuff is the wall I hide behind.
The essence of us, humans, is love. How in the world we get this so messed up, I have no clue. But if you just watch the craziest of us doing the stupidest things, it's all a cry for love. Just give people what they want, sounds easy. Not.
I have a friend who is this guy. He looks like he has it all. And he really has nothing of spiritual value. Lets no one get really close to him, they might want his stuff. I actually feel sorry for him. Maybe there's always hope, as long as there's life. I am going through my stuff, and cleaning-giving-simplifing my life. Only keeping what I love.
This card is a great card to get, if you need money, or help getting money. He's all about land, investments, stock market, stuff. If he just doesn't lose the gift of sharing. Maybe his gift of manifesting money, is a gift, to help those that aren't there yet. So, that's his lesson. Share.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Poetry in Motion
Taking one word that describes each card, I write a poem that includes those words. These 4 cards are the 3 of Swords, the Star, the 6 of Swords, and the 10 of Wands.
'pierce, perfect, passing, protect'
Pierce me,
I'll wear the scars proudly.
So,what if perfect beauty
is not perfect?
To pass on the wounds,
may seem the best choice.
Yet, to protect my heart from pain,
I really never live.
the wounds of life are Art.
Ask to be made beautiful....

Monday, December 03, 2007

I love Journaling with the cards. Today, I randomly drew the 2 of Cups. Great card to play with. Using the 'Alphabet Soup' idea, I write out 26 things I see here. 26 ideas/images to look at.
a.alter, both cups rest on a table, or an alter. In matters of the heart, most of the time if feels like what you long for is unreachable. Laying it on the alter, is surrendering to what you want, letting the one you love, choose you, or not.
b. beloved, seeing a vision of fantastic things in the one you adore. I believe it's called 'rose colored glasses.'
c. consistent, holding true to what your heart seeks.
d.desire, how you feel every time you think of this person.
e. ethereal, heavenly emotions. So fragile you dare not tell anyone how you feel.
f. fantasy, your dream lover, in living color.
g. gallant, brave, fearless in the face of love. No, 'well, I gotta think about this, be getting back to you sometime.'
h. healing, a safe place to bare your ripped up, scarred soul.
i. inspiration, a reason to lose those last 10 pounds, a reason to dance again.
j. jitters, that feeling you have in your tummy when he calls. And to be with him in person, wow.
k. kiss, cannot wait to kiss him. Talking without talking.
l. longing, they see each other, but there seems to be something keeping them apart.
m. musing, daydreaming about him. Your thoughts leading you far away from the work right in front of you, waiting to be done.
n. notice, someone that has your full attention.
o. overcome, usually there will be obstacles to work through. But how sweet to have him by your side working through it together.
p. passion, that sweep you off your feet feeling....
q. quest, the game, the anticipation of seeing that person again, and again.
r. ready, the place you both need to be, to have this really work.
s. selfless, loving them more than yourself. They are you.
t. tender, how you would protect this holy place of love.
u. understanding, knowing why their behavior is weird, you scare them. Got right under the wall, next to their heart.
v. vie, there may be others contending for his affection.
w. woo, gently, win their trust, their heart.
x. eXcite, just seeing them is joy.
y. yes, yes, yes.
z. zati, devotee. You are devoted to this one man. 100%.
The couple on the card are made for each other. Mirror each other. Yet, there seems to be something keeping them apart. Some people believe unless love comes easy and just lands in front of you, it's too much trouble. Others believe it's a gift, and you race after it, pursue it, attain it. I have no answer. When I have tried to make it happen, it eludes me. When I give up, and go do something else, it shows up unexpected. I believe it finds you, but there will be challenges, and that just bring out the best or worst in each other. Then you see the lover in a different light, will the fantasy have the strength to become reality? I believe it can. Eternally optimistic...I am...

Sunday, December 02, 2007

My Friend, Ralph
I am having coffee, browsing through saved emails, deleting what I no longer need, and come across an email from my friend Ralph. I met him about 2 years ago, while on a visit to the lake, he was just he nicest man, loved being retired by the water, working at the Shrine Club. He was 64, still bitter from a divorce, and had no belief in romance. And falling in love, never again. So, when he would come to Springfield to pick up the supplies for the Shrine Club, he would take me out for lunch. We had animated discussions. He believed in nothing he couldn't see, and I believe in everything I cannot see. We enjoyed out debates! One morning, this summer, I notice the Death notices in the Springfield Newsleader online. I never pull them up. And this morning, I do. First name on the list is Ralph. A sudden death, unexpected, he is gone. I didn't go to his funeral, but later this summer when I was back at the lake, I did go by his final resting place. Standing there, with a beautiful view of the lake, big oak trees shading him, there is a little plaque with his name.
2 fresh yellow roses, lay in the fresh brown earth. I talked to him, just wanted a moment to say goodbye. And was curious about his journey on the other side. We had talked about that, and he believed there was nothing. A big nothing.

This morning, I find an old email, left in my files, from him. I sense he is here, and I ask him, Hey, Ralph, so what do you think about death now? Where are you.....(this may sound strange to people that don't know me, but the ones that pass over, are really hanging out all around us. They give us messages all the time....most go unnoticed. And I talk to them, and most of them let me know they heard me...and like it.)

I draw out 3 cards, the ones posted above, his answer....5 of Swords, Ace of Pentacles, and the Death card. How funny! He wasn't happy with going, was angry and disgruntled. A new place of beauty, (looks like an orb, a glowing ball of golden light, a flowered gateway to a new home, and yes, silly Linda, I am dead.)

So, I lay 2 cards on either side of each original card I drew, to see what else he may say to me....I get these.....Strength, by the 5 of Swords, and the Ace of Wands...After the initial tricky step of getting there, he finds himself standing straight up, strong, proud, more alive than ever, ready for this new journey.... By the Ace of Pentacles, I get the Fool and the Lovers
How sweet. He was foolish to not believe. Believe there was more, and there was so much more. A place he is loved, and is pure love. A place he now understands why he had the lessons he had, even the horrible ones, here. And he loves himself for experiencing every single thing he went through. Now, he sees it from the 'other side', and it all makes wonderful sense. He loves, he laughs.The next group, the Emperor card and the Page of Swords lay beside the Death card. He, the father, is worried about one of his sons. I believe he told me there were 3 sons. Issues with one son, lie unfinished. The bitterness falls on this son like a heavy blanket. He argues with Death, and with Life. Seems Ralph left one son, just like him. Sad, bitter and angry at life, and death. With these cards coming up, he would be telling me....this is something he is still working on, from his new home. In the light, he still is the father, and will hang around this son more than the others. This son still needs him.

This card jumps from the deck, like an final say...Temperance. It's all good. He is well, he is home, he is waiting. He would still like to argue with me, that was pretty entertaining for both of us, but he has this one son to love, (he loves the other 2, but they knew it, and loved him back, so very much.) He has things to do and places he goes, he won't rest until this issue with the son is healed.

We are energy, life, and like Jesus said, there is NO death. We just change. This body is like the car you drive, when you are in it, directing it, steering it, it looks like it's moving, it's alive. When you step out of the car, it is still, lifeless. Just a mode of transportation. Same as the body you wear here. A mode of transportation. When it stops working, you are still here, just without this silly skin suit you wear. Until you come back, get a new body. I think Jesus told them...'Ye must be born again....and again....and again.' Keep doing it till you get it right...

Ralph is still here, as are the friends and loved ones you have. Say hi to them, they'll show you, in some strange way, they heard you. ! Linda

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